Lying From Beneath My Skin
by Necrosharpe
Summary: I set this from the point that Jenny and Moira first meet. From her first appearence on the show she intrigued me, this story is about her thoughts and feelings when she comes to LA and her quest to discover who she really is!
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE –

_(Flashback)_

"Hey why don't you get back into the truck "Jenny" and I'll show you how a man really fucks!" The guy stared down at Jenny, his arm closing tighter on Moira's neck. She began to gasp for breath against the pressure he was applying to her throat.

"Let her go bitch!" Jenny repeated. She raised her arm and pointed the tazer gun, directly at the kid's throat.

He seemed to be contemplating what to do next. But at the last moment decided that the yellow and black warning strips at the end of the tazer were not worth the risk. He pushed Moira roughly towards her.

"There's your faggot back." He sneered and turned his back on the two girls making a cocky way back to his pals.

Jenny didn't move, Moira could have sworn she stood motionless but the two electrodes shot out from the end of the gun and hit the kid square in the back. As he lay on the ground shaking the pair of them dashed to the truck, Moira fumbling to get it into gear as they sped out of the garage.

"Hey, we're not faggots, we're dykes! Asshole!" yelled Jenny as they headed back onto the road.

_(End flashback)_

They had been driving for a couple of hours now. Moira's arms ached as she held the truck straight and her eyes felt tired from the persistent staring ahead at the monotonous highway. She didn't complain though. Moira had never been one to complain. She glanced across at Jenny who had dosed off in the passenger seat beside her. She looked so peaceful, A far cry from the troubled young woman she had met in her local bar back in her old mid-western town. She was beautiful, curled up there on the seat breathing slowly, a delicate flower that needed to be protected at all costs. It was perfect. Yet Moira was still angry, angry with herself. The attack by the kids had freaked her out and even now her fingers still trembled, forcing her to grip the wheel even tighter. Of course she wouldn't allow her driving companion to see her shake.

It wouldn't have been so bad if she had been by herself. Sure it had been scary but the most that kid would have done is roughed her up a bit that was all, he wouldn't have tried anything 'else', not in that crowded petrol lot with all those people. It would have been embarrassing yes but only she would have known it would just be another bad memory filed away with the rest of them in the 'recycle bin of her mind'. But she hadn't even been able to put up a fight. She had acquiesced to fear while Jenny, delicate Jenny who was usually so sensitive and demure had rescued her. Cool and calm, but it was she who was supposed to be the strong one, she Moira had always looked out for the ladies kept them safe from harm and the other things in this world that would cause them fear and pain. Yet when it come to the crunch she hadn't been able to do anything. She had been another helpless body in a masculine world, that if it wanted to could hurt and punish her simply because of her sex.

Moira thumped the wheel angrily as she awoke from her daydream. Jenny next to her stirred slightly but didn't wake. Moira gritted her teeth and just stared ahead, her knuckles almost white with the force she applied to the wheel.

"Oh, hey Moira. How long have I been asleep?" Jenny yawned

"I dunno, I think we've done bout 78miles so a good few hours I think."

Jenny looked across at Moira. Her face was so serious, its determined jaw set against the world.

"Are you OK?" Jenny asked looking directly at her,

"I'm fine, you just sit back and relax lady we'll be coming up to a rest stop soon. I'm used to driving long distances." Moira said deliberately staring straight ahead, avoiding Jenny's gaze.

"Oh ..good" Jenny said, "At least I can call Shane, let her know I'm on my way back"

Silence lapsed between the two for a minute. Jenny sat still staring at Moira. Jenny was used to being able to read people, often too well; it was one of her great skills as a writer. But she was plagued with the ability to conjure up a million and one emotions that although had the potential for existence within a particular person, yet these did not always necessarily occur. The result was her writing always maintained a slightly psychotic edge where it's characters seemed incapable of understanding what they were really feeling. But this was Jenny through and through. A woman who not only looked within, but also to her surroundings to find inspiration and direction for her creations. It was a strange feeling for her to see a blank page, nothing written across that face only an inexplicable look of grim determination. She decided that a little probing questioning would be in order.

"Moira, you said you were a computer technician right?"

"Yeah," Moira replied cautiously

"Well I was wondering, I guess why did you become involved in that? Since I met you I always, I dunno had you pegged as the outdoorsy type. Seems pretty isolated to be stuck in front of a screen all day. Not that I can really comment," she laughed.

Moira allowed herself a smile,

"I guess I am a bit. I dunno I always liked computers I guess. Once you get to know one that's it you know them all. With a computer everything is mechanical and you can predict how it is going to react in almost every situation."

Jenny laughed,

"I don't know about my laptop, it used to do all sorts of crazy stuff I used to give it a bash if it went wrong. It seemed to normally do the trick."

"The trick is to understand computers; once you know how they work everything is simple. But I guess that is a philosophy that can cover anything. Once you understand something, it always becomes a lot easier to manage."

Jenny mulled over this briefly, it seemed fairly profound to her but it also seemed to be in part an explanation for Moira. She was a simple being but her existence was complicated by other people. How she was perceived by her peers and their reaction to her. Jenny felt a sudden closeness to Moira, a feeling that had previously lain dormant. How ironic they should be bought together by the idea of distance, the great gulf that lay between their personalities and lifestyles.

"Hey misty eyed lady. Let's pull in here."

"Where are we?" Jenny asked

"Trust me, I think you'll like it," Moira grinned.

She jumped out and opened the door for Jenny helping her out of the truck. Arm in arm they made their way into the bar. The flashing lights of 'Lasso Lady' blinking erriely into the dark.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO –

Moira lay in the back of the truck, her hands clasped behind her head as she watched Jenny gently doze beside her. It was a beautiful night, all the stars shone above her while the crisp breeze floated over them. A world of promise that is what lay ahead, a chance of a new start away from one horse towns and repression. It seemed almost too good to be true. She looked over a Jenny sleeping peacefully like a baby beside her. What a complex being she was. Moira had tried to understand her on many occasions but had failed to do so, maybe this was a flaw on her part but then Jenny was an extremely distorted young woman. But then she wondered sometimes if she did think too much. They were such different people; Jenny with her ever loquacious personality spewing its words and thoughts out in random torrents while Moira was quiet and shy. But then Moira did think and she did think a lot. Now as she gazed across at Jenny she thought back to earlier in the bar. She had been dancing with that women, she didn't know why it seemed to come naturally to her but the Jenny had barged over. They had both been a bit drunk, those tequilas had been fairly potent. It was another thing that Moira didn't understand.

_(flashback) _

"Are you going to tell me what you want? Or are you going to sit there acting all weird and silent?" Moira asked.

Jenny lay sprawled across the bed looked back at her. Her face was half mingled with disgust and bemusement. "What do you mean, what do I want?" she replied,

"I mean you say you don't wanna be my girlfriend but then you got all weird and jealous girlfriend on me back there?"

Jenny paused for a moment in contemplation, "yeah, it was…fucked up." She stared back at Moira with those deep smoky eyes. Moira looked back at her almost unseeingly. She was annoyed that wasn't really an answer.

"Do you wanna be my outlaw girlfriend Jenny? Do you wanna be my friend? Do you just wanna be my fuck-buddy on the road, want do you want?"

It was an honest question and Jenny felt it. She looked down at the pillow, but then looked up smiling a little as she did so.

"I want you to get up against the wall."

Slightly confused Moira did as she was told.

"Now unbutton your shirt," Jenny added still smiling. "Open." She added watching Moira obey her commands.

Moira stood there watching as Jenny got up and sauntered over to her. She leant into her grabbing her waist in her delicate hands before reaching up to Moira's face. Moira couldn't resist any longer. She leant forwards and kissed her deeply feeling her waif like figure beneath her hands.

"Tell me you want me to fuck you." Jenny whispered in her ear. "You never let me fuck you."

But as she reached down into the top of her trousers, Moira grabbed her hand.

"No….I can't, I'm sorry." She looked deep at Jenny as she walked over to the bed and sat down.

"I'm sorry." Jenny said,

"Hey come here, come on."

As Jenny sat down she reached out and hugged her tightly, it seemed that she understood what was unspoken between them.

_(end flashback) _

But what was it that she had been thinking. It had been troubling Moira for some time and she had wondered what exactly it was at the back of her mind. She partly knew, it was her ultimate secret desire that she had told no one. But even looking up at that bright night sky it still seemed an impossible dream. But she had felt it then when Jenny had spoken to her in the motel it just wasn't right anymore it was like she was existing but she wasn't really living. It was alot to takein,realisation that your life was a lie and you were still lying even now. But as Moira looked back up at the stars she knew what she had to do, whatever the consequences. With this in mind she rolled over and gently fell asleep.


End file.
